20 Things I Hate About You.........

So with The Premiership twenty seasons old this week, we @ It's a Football Thing thought we'd take a look @ twenty reasons to hate top tier in England.........hold on to your hats here we go!
(In no particular order)

1 - The Untouchable - Sir Alex Ferguson
Can this man do anything wrong? Flashing back to when he jumped wildly in the air against Sheffield Wednesday, when United won their first Premier League title, to almost retiring a few years back! This ageing Scotsman just keeps getting better and better!

2 - Going Down - Diving
Simulation if you like, back in the day you actually had to be touched before hitting the deck and even if you were namby pamby enough to go down you'd get straight back up again for a bit of vengeance!

3 - Shit Kits
I remember not so long ago, when a kit would last a few seasons! Now it's all change every year! The problem is, a lot of the kit manufactures are running out of ideas, and the kits are looking shitter and shitter! Take the Kappa skin tight kits, not the best fit for pub crawling wanderers like ourselves! Now add to that a random colour!.. well infact they come in every bloody colour under the rainbow! From Newcastles orange and yellow sherbert mix, to Spurs Brown disaster and United's famous Grey mess!

4. Shake on it! - The Pre-Match Handshake
I walk into work in the morning and the first thing I do is shake my fellow workers hands..... no I put the kettle on and have a cuppa! Why on earth do we insist on the players shaking hands before the game?  I wanna see 11 grown men play a fair, full on contact game of football, then congratulate each other after the game with a proper handshake and a pint! The handshake before a game means nothing! They all end up trying to get each other sent off!

5 - The Men in Black - Officials
No longer in black, in fact every colour but! In a premier league we surely deserve premier referees and 'assistants'. But week in week out they get it wrong, whether they run the line or blow the whistle when are we going to get professional match officials??

6 - Off or On - The Offside Rule
Just get it sorted! All this second phase bollocks!

7 - Can I Kick It? - Multi coloured boots
Once upon a time, boots were black. Then they were white, now they are every colour of the rainbow, some players have been known to wear one of each colour!
It's another example where advertising and fashion have now taken hold of the modern game.

8 - All Weather - Games being called off
Oh no there's a bit of snow! With all this health and safety bullshit meaning more and more games are getting called off, whats the point of the orange/yellow ball anymore? Fans love a snow ball fight on the way to a game!

9 - Show Us Yer Tackle - Football is a contact sport
Along with diving, the major evil of the today's game. Football is in danger of turning into a non contact sport! Whatever happened to the sliding tackle? Obviously we don't want decapitation, but if you get the ball - One footed? Two footed - does it matter??

10 - Ronaldo
I could write 20 bloody points on this knobhead! The face, the diving, the step over, the cheating, the tan, the fact that he got Rooney sent off during the 2004 Euros, and then to top it all off demanding a move away from United to play for Real as he claimed La Liga is far superior than the English game....

11 - Take your seats - Modern Grounds
As teams look to make more dosh, the first thing they look at doing is tearing down their historic ground, and then creating a swimming pool like arena, an arena with no atmosphere, no identity, no sound! Just look @ the Emirates

12 - Bloody Foreigners! - The Rise of the Footballing Import
Now we're not talking about all foreigners, after all where would we be without Klinsmann, Bergkamp or little Frankie Zola. But then opened the floodgates, with every Thom, Rickard or Henry coming over here doing our jobs and stealing our women! The latest fashion accessory it seemed was a foreigner in your side and who could forget Brolin, Boogers & Veron!?!

13 - The Big Four - Over emphasis on the top teams
Every weekend, it's the big four this, the big four that! Who's says their the big four? Only Sky and what do they know? Do we really need it forced down our throats all the time? And don't get us started on them manipulating the fixtures to give us "Showdown Sunday" or " Armageddon Tuesday"

14 - Sweet FA - The Demise of The FA Cup
With the rise of The Premiership we've seen the fall of the FA Cup, with Man U bowing out completely one year for the World Club Championship. Do we need to remind you that this years final kicks off @ 5:15??

15 - Are We The Champions - The Rise of The Champions League
The Champions league, a league for winners! Why not give 2 places to the league (1st & 2nd) and then the FA Cup & Carling Cup winners should be given the other 2 places! Because @ the moment finishing 3rd or 4th means more than winning a cup!

16 - Club v Country - The Downfall of England
One of the fall outs from over emphasis on winning the Premiership & The Champions League is players taking a sickie when the International call comes. Not only that, but with the influx of players from abroad how are the youngsters expected to come through the ranks? Joe Hart England's Number One great 'keeper that he is, is really unopposed, where are our young goalies??

17. - Because I'm worth it...... - Adverts
It's all about how much players can make it a short amount of time, from Pepsi max to Pringles, to phones or even airlines! Grow some balls lads! Advertisement has gone mental! Shame no ones done an advert advertising diving hey!

18 - All Change - Player Loyalty
One team players how many in The Premiership Years have there been? Matt Le Tiss? Ledders @ Spurs? Donkey Adams @ Arsenal. There are a few others, but we are talking only a handful. With the promise of a fast buck players, with the help (or hindrance) of their agents will jump ship @ the drop of a hat! And it's not just the players...........

19 - Leeds
The last winners of the old first division, and the real first financial disaster in the Premiership, In the late 90's early 2000's Leeds had it all, England internationals, a great ground, history, a strong fan base, Champions League football and then over night it went all tits up! Placing their bets on Champions League qualification, Leeds over spent and we all know what happened next..... After too many years out of the top flight it would be fitting if our old pal Neil Warnock could guide them back to the Premiership next season!

20 - The Prawn Sandwich Brigade - The rise of the corporate fan
Back in the day it was a pie and a Bovril on the terrace. Now, it's a fiver for a warmed up burger and two quid for a KitKat! True fans are being priced out of the game in favour for big businesses 'entertaining' clients in boxes............where's the fun in that??

....and the Award goes to.

We've reached that time of year, when people (the media & public alike) look back on the year and dish out their annual awards...Man of the Year, Award for the Best Award Award......you know the sort of thing. Well we've already unveiled our team of the year (to rapturous silence) so we thought why not go the whole hog, clamber unsteadily up onto the bandwagon and give out some awards of our own, starting with......

Cult Hero of the Year

To me the term "Cult Hero" means one of those players that maybe doesn't stand out for his footballing ability, they provoke as much hate (if not more) as they do love from the terraces, there is a rapport though with the supporters and his off the field antics are followed just as closely as his on the pitch movement. There have been a few to chose from this year, players that unite the fans even of rival teams. Honorary mentions should go to David Luiz @ Chelsea maybe not up to the defensive duties all the time, but with hair like that kid out of Outnumbered and his  CFTV appearances he has brought a smile to fans faces since arriving from Brazil, Joey Barton divides opinion but taking to Twitter to vent his spleen against the 'Cockney Mafia' @ St James Park and in the process sticking up for the fans proved the way forward for all aspiring members of football's Twitterati.
But the winner is Mario Balotelli, sure he has scored a few goals (one with an arrogant shoulder) but it's his larger than life persona and eccentric behaviour off the pitch that have engaged the fans & media alike, whether it's driving into a woman's prison 'just to have a look round' or handing wads of cash out to tramps one things for sure we could do with a lot more like him...and all three have that magic ingredient that's lacking in some.........a personality.

Signing of the Year

A decent signing should do what he's been bought in to do, make an impact, fill a gap and ultimately improve the squad. There's many a risk involved, agents hounding managers trying to get him to buy his star player that he's only ever seen on YouTube, trying to get that skin flint Chairman to stump up the cash, only 'a couple more players away from a Championship winning team' and every fan knowing exactly what's needed to make the team better!

Luiz Suarez, Scott Parker, Sergio Augero have all been banded about as the most deserving winner, but for me it's Demba Ba. Signed initially @ West Ham on a pay as play deal his first steps into the Premiership were not ideal with the team ending the season on the way to The Championship, he managed seven goals in twelve though, not bad for a team hanging on for most of the season and once The Hammers fell through the Premiership trap door his release clause was triggered and in stepped Newcastle Utd!

There was interest from other parties and Alan Pardew (for the money paid) for me has the signing of the season, what a coup selling Andy Carroll for £30-odd million and replacing him successfully with someone on a freebie. With two hat-tricks already this season The Toon will miss Ba while he's @ The African Nations Cup and when he gets back how long will they be able to keep hold of him once the bigger boys come calling?

Rising Star

With more and more foreigners in the Premiership young players coming through the ranks at your club are in danger of becoming as rare as rocking horse shit! Obviously lack of money @ some teams means they rely on rising stars that much more. The usual route to stardom used to revolve around polishing boots & cleaning toilets as life as an apprentice, but nowadays it's any number of loan moves to the lower leagues to get that valuable experience. With the promise of money and fame ever more present in the game today some of these young upstarts get too big for their boots though, with agents whispering in their ears and the chance to make a quick buck for all parties, they're off........not always to better things.

Young players that have made it through have finally come to fruition this year with the likes of Scott Sinclair, Kyle Walker & Daniel Sturridge all going out on lower league loans before being deemed worthy or finding a club that will play them.

But for rising star I'm going for Phil Jones who after impressing @ Blackburn has gone on to bigger things at Old Trafford and has a bright future as one of England's new Young Lions with his versatility making him a cert for the Euro 2012 squad.

Those are my awards then, I'm sure we could have come up with other categories, maybe you can? What's you opinion? Let us know by commenting below or have your say on our Facebook page....

Scout and about - Shaun Wright Phillips

When our resident Scout comes into the office on a Monday morning, he usually brings with him tales of young, new, little known players he has seen on his weekends away.  Royston Drenthe @ Everton, Rubén Rochina with Blackburn or Paul Pogba @ Old Trafford amongst others have all had him salivating into his first hot cuppa and cheeky Hob Nob of the day.
So this week when the name Shaun Wright-Phillips was on every one's lips we thought we'd heard it all before. But with his early season form and promise of regular first team football, SWP could about to be a player revitalised.

Arriving @ Loftus Road as the transfer window had started to creak to a close, Shaun faced an on the spot interview from the Sky Sports Reporter who had taken up squatting rights there that particular evening and it was clear for all to see that he really didn't want to leave Manchester, but with the only other option that of getting splinters on his bum from warming the City bench, he decided the time was right to leave the club he loved and played for twice for a new life in West London.

Now 29 years of age it's fair to say that he wasn't helped in his first few seasons at Maine Road by lack of stability at the club, going through managers like a dose of salts and the added bonus of relegation probably didn't help.
But after breaking into the side under Kevin Keegan he became a fans favourite winning the 'Young Player of the Year' award on four successive occasions. It was then that he first appeared in an England shirt and attracted the attention of Chelsea, who paid £21m for his services.

Once again managerial turmoil at a club hindered his career, add to that this time the owners need for instant success and SWP was once again on the periphery of things. During his time he did however continue to appear and score for his country.
Inevitably really after one managerial shake up too many he fell out of favour completely and was granted a return to the Sky Blues.

Without taking anything away from QPR something SWP is more likely to get now is first team football and of course if a player is playing week in week out their confidence and form improves. This could lead to a return to the England set up where his bustling, energetic approach has earned him praise on International Duty in the past.
England have had their fair share of wingers trying to stake a claim for a regular spot in the team, but even if the early season form of Ashley Young has made him a first choice, there is still a place on the other flank there for the taking.
Let's hope for Shaun's sake that the recent  takeover @ The Hoops doesn't mean a case of history repeating and that this new start isn't another false dawn.